Bastardly Breaking News! Mischa Barton Might Have Two Dogs & One Man-Slave!
Wednesday, March 14th, 2007 late in the morning while chugging coffee
Related in a Bastardly way:
Joe Simpson SOLD Jessica Simpson's Old Blonde Look to Sophie Monk!
Tuesday, February 13th, 2007 in the middle of the damn afternoon
Bastardly sources close to the Joe Simpson's private company, I Whore My Daughters for A Living Incorporated, tell us that a secret deal was worked out by Sophie Monk, an Australian pop singer, to purchase---yes, readers, purchase---Jessica Simpson's look. I never knew there was a market for purchasing another celebrity's "look."
Here's what we've learned: The deal was worth roughly $500k---an amount most in the industry would consider to be chump-change. Besides being super cheap, it was simple on the contractual front: Jessica Simpson simply had to dye her hair to something else & disappear from the scene for a while. In exchange, Sophie Monk's party would cough up the dough.
Fucking Joe Simpson. Is there no end to his daughter-whoring?!!
Bastardly Breaking News! We Give A Crap About Rachel Bilson @ Mr. Chow's
Thursday, February 8th, 2007 after a late four martini lunch
Where as we didn't really care about Tila Nguyen getting noticed at Mr. Chow's, holy crap it's Rachel Bilson at Mr. Chow's! Now that's breaking!!!!!
Bastardly Breaking News! Pregnant Tori Spelling About to Explode!
Tuesday, February 6th, 2007 late in the whored-out afternoon while still at work
Related in a Bastardly way:
Bastardly Breaking News! Angelina Jolie, Nanny Brad Pitt & Family in NYC!
Saturday, December 9th, 2006 in the middle of the damn afternoon
Related in a Bastardly way:
Bastardly Breaking News!! Halle Berry Shops @ Crate & Barrel!
Saturday, December 9th, 2006 after a late four martini lunch
