GAP Sacks Overrated Joss Stone!
Monday, July 25th, 2005 while thinking about eating a Bastardly Mercado Certified lunch

Overrated, busted-up, or simply used & abused whore. Whatever you want to call her, Jossie would probably fit the bill. Joss Stone just didn't deserve that job b/c let's admit it, in order to have your face plastered on commercials & 20-story NYC billboards, you have to be somewhat hot. I don't mean to be poking fun @ only Joss b/c that old bitch from Sex & the City (S.J. Parker) also proved that the execs @ Gap were all either smoking too much crack or getting daily blowjobs courtesy of Ms. Parker. Bottom-line is simple, my friends. Gap's painfully bleeding in style, sales & marketability.
Screw style & sales for now. Let's talk marketing. Gap's marketing department seriously needs to get their heads out of their fucking asses & get some hot bitches rockin' their MADE IN CHINA (for 3cents) line of clothing. If they cannot properly market their shit, how can they ever con kids into believing Gap's the hottest thing around? Impossible, I tell you.
Anyway, what's the fake reason for booting Joss that Gap, Inc. is bullshitting ot the press?
People take the age of consent extremely seriously in America. The backbone of Gap's business is in small towns in Middle America where people are very, very conservative, especially in the Southern Bible Belt.
As a result I think they have made it pretty clear that Stone's association with the company is over. Big companies such as Gap always err on the side of caution. [GAP Rep, contactmusic]
Ok, now let's look @ some photos of a lady who should be on one of those 'smoking is bad for you' billboards.












I was just so thrilled to not have to see that old, homely, scrawny, witchy poo hag S.J.P. everywhere. It was a good day when she was canned.
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Okay I get it, older women=bad, blonde chicks=sluts & whores, and asian/latina women can do no wrong. This M.O. is getting old.
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What's m.o.
sorry, I'm not good w/ internet acros...
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MO means...Mode of Operation (Modis Operindai)
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not necessarily.
1. I think Teri Hatcher is sexy (when she's not looking like michael jackson, of course). She's 40.
2. There are ugly Asian chicks. We just choose not to post them b/c we don't want to scare people.
3. As for blonde chicks, of course they're not all sluts & whores. We judge on a case by case basis & it's just that the blondes we do post are sluts & whores.
4. Also, Eva Longoria is latina & has black hair, but she's classified in the sluts & whore category, so that negates a couple of your points.
5. Lastly, no one said that sluts & whores can't be hot. MEn sleep with them for a reason, right? So at the end of the day, it's all very complicated!
6. I don't know why I made a list.
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What the fuck is the big deal? Look at picture 3 and tell me she's not hot. And have you heard the girl sing? Unlike most of the pop filth in the world this girl's actually got TALENT. If she didn't she wouldn't have endorsements in the first place. I'm kinda agreeing with Len on this one... you've posted up some pretty average minorities and raved over them, and keep claiming that good looking white girls, particularly those who are recognized for their talent rather than looks alone, are vastly "overrated". And Bai Ling is fucking ugly.
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And did you see who The Gap is replacing Joss with? Michelle Williams, aka the Ugly One in Destiny's Child. She's got a receding hairline and is the poster child for African-American anorexia.
http://www.trinidadexpress.com/shared/images/2005/03/27/destiny.jpg
But she's not white, so I guess she's "underrated".
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Marky you should consider starting a blog of your own where you can talk about everything you don't agree with over here.
Just make sure to properly link to us :-)
Also, we understand when you disagree when we state the facts.
http://www.bastardly.com/archives/2004/05/12/about-the-writers/
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I love the latinas and asians as much as the next guy, but please... Bai Ling is NOT attractive. She has zero meat on her bones and no sex appeal whatsoever, plus a terrible face with a beat nose and awful smile. Even if you do think she's attractive, you can't disagree that there's at least two dozen other asian hotties out there that are unquestionably better.
And yes, Moe, I do understand that you're just voicing your opinions, but I'm just saying that on your recent underrated kick, your opinions are completely ridiculous, and that, more than anything, Bai Ling is disgusting. Its not worthy of creating a blog to just bash your posts, but come on now. You've done better in the past, and I know you can do better.
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OCG, Bai Lin is disgusting...the only reason she posed for Playboy was to try and become famous. And she figured she could be a hit cause she was gonna be in Star Wars but got cut out. She is a nobody and because shes ugly nobody cares
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Take it easy, so you’re not into Bai Ling and I am, no problem.
We all have different tastes here. The Gap needs to move in a different direction anyway. It’s obvious this beast, err chick Joss Stone was cuttin’ it.
The pictures are glaring proof of that. If they really want to increase sales and capture market share they should go with Eva Longoria. She’s the next J-Lo
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no worries, OCG!
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[...] Ling’s Star Wars promo shot that she didn’t get to use. Since so many of you people have expressed hate towards this peaceful woman who’s f [...]
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Hmmm, why the hate on Joss? Sounds to me that she LIKES the older man crowd. So all of us dirty, dirty old guys would have a shot at spankin' her 18 year old ass.
She looked pretty hot in that one shot where she's bent over showin' off the girls.
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If Joss is ugly, then, shit, ugly ain't that bad
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But, wasn't she 17, and her BF 26? I dunno, I kinda agree. Wait.........I'M 26!..........conservative bible-thumping bastards! :)
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oh wow, i wasnt ever into Joss Stone, not musiclly (sounds like a man) and didnt think she was all that attractive, but that picture of page 2, oh my god.
id SO drop my rock hard cock between those sweet tits and proceed use her open mouth like one of those recepticle cups you get at the sperm bank.
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damn, i seen her on punked and i thought joss stone was a beautiful and pretty down to earth. i haven't heard of a recent joss stone hit in a while so i guess its a smart move for a company to hire a more recent "celeb".
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Are you nuts?
Bai Ling is sexier and hotter looking than this glorified piece of trash, Joss Stone.
Look at those pictures, dude, its no wonder the Gap canned her.
Looks like she stepped out of a garbage bin and has a horrible body.
Bai Ling exudes sexuality and wears the hell out of whatever she has on.
No question, her body is bangin’, which is why she was featured in Playboy.
Joss couldn’t even sell a few t-shirts, khakis, or cargo pants. How pathetic is that?
Moe, keep up the outstanding work! More flava', asian and latin chicks
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OCG you must be on crack. Bai Ling is one ugly piece of trash. And you're calling Joss's body horrible? At least she isn't a twig like Bai Ling. I think Joss has got curves in all the right places.
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ocg-unit... youre an idiot. joss is so pure looking and attractive. bai ling is complete trailer trash, and got on playboy for publicity, and maybe because she has ungodly nipples, not because shes talented and really hot. shes disgusting. i think youre overruled on this one.
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Playboy paid Carnie Wilson to pose in their rag. How much airbrush time did THAT require, to take out all the Frankenstitch scars from the nips and tucks she had to have to remove all the flappin skin? Just getting into Playboy is not a guarentee of hotness. Nothin against Bai Ling, but she's no Gong Li or Maggie Cheung.
I like Joss Stone a hell of a lot more than that syphillitic Britney Spears.
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If those “curves� work for you than fantastic, whatever you’re into bro
I’m just not into a chick that’s carrying a pouch larger than her breasts.
You feel me. As far as Bai Ling is concerned she’s hot and she put it down by posing for Playboy. Hef’s one smart dude, who knows better than most what’s hot and sexy.
You may not agree, and that’s fine.
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