Are you sure you are 22? Those are faces 12 year olds make when they are trying to be sexy. You've got a nice body and live in Hawaii, so I got to think that you get a fair amount of sun... those tats are going to be faded green monstrosities, just like the ones the paroled carnies have, in about 3 or 4 more years. Shit, hon, it is time to start making better choices before you end up doing something stupider than getting an unfortunate tattoo and having people shit on you via the Internet.

I'm sick today so I am feeling all fatherly; otherwise I would be dogging you pretty hard.