not bad. +3 points for knowing your way around a car.

You dont look like any of the celebrities that u mentioned! but cute!

Natural beauty is what Mr Chicken Man likes.
And Jessie has it.
HOT

cute and fun!

naughty ;)

lilyspryte, the first thing that popped into my head when I read your comment....

\"Mortal Kombat for Sega Genesis is the best game ever....\" \"Donkey Kong sucks\" \"...you know what, YOU SUCK!\"

gotta love Billy Madison!!!

yes, you must love Billy Madison......

No cheating, especially with my wife, who is a dirty dirty whore.

At first I thought she was cute. Then she got dirty and smelly looking.

TPATS: 3

I would hit it a few times w/o beer. This would have to occur before the big boobs started their descent to the floor. I don't think I would hang around though, because if I wanted to be boning a guy; I'd go watch brokeback mountain or something. She appears to have some gender issues. I don't understand guys who find a girl acting like a guy sexy, is it a closet fag phenomena?

This one is hot. Boobs can never be too big. Would like to see more pictures like the last one. Maybe I am starting to like blondes....except for Lisa S. who still doesn't get it.

And, any chic who would lay on her back under a car and let oil drip on her would be up for just about anything. UUUMMMM!!!!

You mean all a girl has to say is she changes her own oil and is into mariokart and she is "hot" All I see is that her face is cute and she has the possibility of having big boobs...was there something else I am missing? How in the hell did you get oil up to your elbow? LOL

Ya'll might think her answer to the 3 million dollar question was good...well here is one lady that won't sell her soul to money. You can say 3 million is worth it but don't speak for us all sweetpea...3 million ain't shit for my rep or self respect...where the f**k is yours?

Number 13.....I SPOKE WAY TOO SOON!!!!!

Finally a BLOTD that is not raked over the coals! Kudos to you Jessie!

And Angel, I'm sure you've fucked for a lot less.

Any chick who isn't afraid of getting sticky stuff on her face gets 2 thumbs up.

We have a winner here folks, don't sleep.

She looks like an anime character. I love it.

DAve, You guys know me too well ! haha

but nah-- imma be real here ... Shes Hot in a cute, goofy, girl next door type of way.. cant hate on that --- See not all blondes are the same =-) You got the Porn-starrish pam anderson Blondes .... then you got the cute Cameron Diaz-ish blondes - u Cant hate on variety... this is what makes America what it soo beautifully is....

Now excuse me while i go throw myself in an oven to fry myself to a crisp.. =-) jk

lisa. stay in that oven and die

yeh ur alright, i would give you the honour of sucking my dick

#32 comment, John's perception and argument are not off, because it has to do with Psychology, and every fucked up individual is different, so there have to be theories to cover all areas, you both hit it dead on, just from two different sides.

what about it doesn't make sense?
you don't think someone trying to convince themselves and the world they weren't gay would try to find the most feminine woman possible.
your POV actually confirms this,
because people feel the way you do
people trying to stay in the closet would never be with someone that was masculine looking or acting
because as you have just done
they would be called out at gay
and according to your logic the best way to avoid being called gay would be to find the most womanly looking and acting woman you could get.

BLOTDFan
"The only problem is my POV and argument makes sense, yours is a stretch in fantasyland. Sorry to inform. BTW, agree on the pressley comment."

I could approach your initial point by saying gender roles are so deeply embedded in you that you are unable to comprehend that there is no correlation between finding a broad who knows about cars attractive, and the dude being a closet homosexual.

Great bone structure and fabulous eyebrows. At least one chick on this site has been going to a salon. I really doubt you're 21 though. You look like you're 16 or 17, definitely still in high school.

HAWWWWWWWWWWWT !!

She looks great! OMG you go gurl!

Decently normal this time. I still say post pictures of you just "being" while your friends/family take the pictures. Like something non planned for this site. I think that's what makes it so cheesy is you just know these girls are sitting at their computer and think, "I think I'll go get some pictures taken to subit to this site". How about just going through your files of your most recent gathering or party or occassion and find some that were taken naturally for the moment. Something sincere to wash all these planned self photo sessions away.
The car/oil thing might be sincere...but who knows. More like that I'd say... if you understand where I'm coming from.

I say yessie to a messy Jessie; i see a little Jaime P in there.
Any picture with a hot chick on her back covered in oil is welcome any time here....

PLZ GRAB SOME Proactiv FAST-- & whats that BINDI WART doing between your eyebrows---it looks hideous.

Try buying a brush for one---& some wart crean removal (forehead location) & get some dental work done while ur at it.

I'd like to go with the flow, but I'm just not feeling this one. TPATS: 2.

Something about this one tells me she is trouble. Maybe I'd use her for a one-night stand.

thanks guys! lol now let me clear up the messy oil thing. what happened was my oil filter was on really really tight and had just about given up hope on getting it off when it loosened and poured oil EVERYWHERE!! it surprised me and i let go and dropped the filter in the pan holding the oil from then tank = oil splashed everywhere.

also "# Nancy

Great bone structure and fabulous eyebrows. At least one chick on this site has been going to a salon. I really doubt you’re 21 though. You look like you’re 16 or 17, definitely still in high school.
Thursday, May 11, 2006 at 12:07 pm "

THANKS! i appreciate it...i actually do my own hair and eyebrows. and yeah i am 21...april 17, 1985 so just barely.

i'm a junior majoring in International Business so dont let the blonde hair fool you. i graduated high school with a 3.8 and a 1220 SAT.

Lol, people are freakin hilarious, first off just beacuse a guy digs a chick who can be self-reliant, dependant and can get dirty without whining about changing for the 5th time in a day or breaking a nail does not make a dude gay, it makes him smart. Plus I feel that a guy who is always questioning the sexual prefrences of other guys probally makes him the one who's confused. Second, to Fiona I think that its more likey a freckle not a wart, and if it is a wart I wanna know how much time you spent analyzing that pic at 400% zoom in photoshop??

lol yeah...its definitely NOT a wart. u think i'd let that stay on my face? no def. not.

Nice all-around girl. But it looks like you've got feces on your face in the car picture, the fact that you can do an oil change doesn't count either way to me, I can do many things most people can't too, but who gives a shit, ya know? Good for you.

I had a crazy wart once. The thing had a life of about 10 months and I methodically made attempts to assasinate said blemish. It began as a small little bugger on my middle finger, and since I have had them before, I knew how to get rid of them. Kill the seed.

I began puting various wart removers on it and keeping it wrapped in a band aid. It would get a shell on the outside, being very dry, but on the inside, a demon slept. After a couple of weeks wrapped up in the band aid it would hurt. I could feel my pulse in it. I thought an alien would spawn from it. I took the band aid off and stopped with the wart remover and it would grow back bigger and stronger. This went on for 6 months. Sometimes I would rub it with sandpaper to whittle it down. Sporatically, in a fit of rage, I would take a razor blade and perform surgery on the mound, attempting to get at the seed. The thing had an artery, it hurt badly. It bled profusely. It grew back bigger and more painful. I would not give up. It would not beat me. Doubts crept into my subconscious.

During the first month since I made my move to the desert I had a couple climate induced afflictions. Being so dry, and me not being from a dry climate, my nose dried up so bad that it cracked and bled routinely. My lips chapped and bleeding. The wart, a rock. One day at my moms house I found a pumice stone and started rubbing the wart to whittle it down. This time, it whittled down dramatically. I repeated these steps for a week and the fucking 10 month long struggle was surprisingly over. The wart was killed. I had won.

If you cant get rid of a wart, move to the desert and rub it with pumice.

Dirty whore.

Hey Jess you should have learned from giving BJs that when you least expect it....SKEEEET!!!!

You crack me up dude...lol..That whole intelligent story about your renegade wart and you end it with "Dirty Whore" lol my boss came and to ask what I was laughing at so I showed him then he fell on the floor laughing. Lets hope he doesnt ask me why im browing the web...

I definitely see Jamie Pressley.

lol it spilled everywhere and my best friend was like rolling on the floor laughing and then said "DONT MOVE I HAVE TO TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS" there. story explained...

Fuck morals i would fuck someone for 3 million dollars........

Her boobs are not that big at all.

We've been nice we deserve a thanks. C'mon Jess, how about a full body shot?

lol...in case u guys havent noticed i am SO bored at work...a full body shot? lol hmm i dont really have any on my new laptop.

i just took this at work...camera phones only fit so much though...sorry :(

Jess you have gotten rave reviews here compared to all of the other BLOTDs. Even Lisa S. had to admit that you were OK. Keep it real.

And Lisa S' approval is the motherfucking seal of good taste!

that's because anything that doesn't remotely look like Lisa S. is good.

bite me you cunt =-)

WHOA!
kiss your mother with that keyboard?

I actually thought your first picture was lindsey lohan in her blonde era, until I scrolled down. I know it's not a good thing to look like LL--unfortunately that's the celebrity that people think I look like, so I know that it sounds mean if I say that. In the other pictures you look nothing like her though. Much cuter.

And Mariokart is the greatest game ever invented--especially the N64 one. Halo is fun too though.

****lisa. stay in that oven and die**************

come on, lisa s. has a good sense of humor. quit being mean to her. She's funny. Like I said before, most people would not have come back to this site the way she was raked over the coals like she was. Give credit where credit is due.

all right, im gonna apologize here. you know what? i thought about things for awhile, and i looked into the mirror, i think i see what you guys mean. i really am not that pretty at all. god. i wish i am though. i think i should get some plastic surgeries to make me look better. but other than that, sorry to all the bastardly readers and all the girls i made fun of in the past. yo know i only did it cuz i was jealous. sorry that i was such an arrogant bitch.

that's not her

I wouldn't touch you with a 12 foot pole you walking std.

that was meant for Lisa S.

very hot! very cute! great smile! you rock!

really pretty! in the last pic she looks like natalie portman! gorgeous!!!;)

IMHO said ***I see how this works, if the girl is funny, it doesn’t matter how unattractive she is, she still gets a thumbs up from the bastardly readers. ****

yeah it looks like that's the case IMHO also don't forget she plays mariokart AND she would fuck anything for 3 million...those are also appear to be a plus for receiving positive comments.

Hey, fucking anything for $3m is just keeping it real.

would u fuck ur mom and dad at the same time for 3 million dollars?............

No, that's two people. I'm into intimacy.

TOO DAMNED CUTE!!! Plus I LOVE the "WYSIWYG" attitude, happy to be herself... definitely one of the best BLOTD's!!!

Not perfect but far better than the previous contestants.

Hey Len...I am kinda a car girl too...my toy is a 1999 Civic Si-strictly stock (except for the stereo)...my dream car...definitely a convertible ccuda...how about you?

She looks good in the car pic but all the others are either webcam low-res or horrendously overexposed, which makes me suspicious as to why she can't produce a decent high-res pic of herself.

Without a doubt, Crack makes you Fast and John create some of the most ingenious and hilarious comments ever typed.

Now about the BLOTD - very cute and a decent rack, but what's up with the 35 yr old tri-flab under that 21 yr old arm in the car pic? Here, I'll just say it before someone else does:

"optical illusion"

ummm...yeah.....

Lay off the Cheetos and hit the gym a few times a week and you'll be rockin'.

Scooter

Mmmmmm, noodle soup.

Oh. I dig that last shot, the one with the shitty lighting. For some reason she makes me think of Jenny McCarthy, with the goofy grin and the huge eyes. Pretty cute. Another winnah.

You know, the 3million dolla question is kinda old now (no offense Glimmer my boy), we need some new questions to ask these chicks.... Such as:
1- How often do you read 'The Bastardly' a day
2- IF, and this is a big IF, Moe or Jackson sent the BLOD a baby T, would they take a picture of themselves in it to be posted in the gallery of Bastardly Bitches?
3- Should there be a Bitch Off(tm)(c), would they be willing to wrestle the other chicks in a no-holds-barred jello match?

Now THOSE are the questions enquiring minds want to know.

Giddeeeeyup

hey scooter...its not flab...its a relaxed tricep on a bar..im a butterfly swimmer.

She's pretty, but she lost my vote with her first line, 'tired of seeing a lot of “fake” girls'
Are you a natural blond? Judging by the color of your eyebrows, no. So, you are one of those fake girls!
But I must admit, you are in the top three.
I see Lindsay Lohan when I look at your pics.

No, not necessarily, a lot of blonde people have darker eyebrows, and eyelashes that are darker still. So I wouldn't say she's fake based on that at all. How do you know she's not one of those blondes that are really light-brown haired that just got sun-bleached?

I see dark roots on the, "spank me I'm dirty and full of oil" picture. That is a very bottle blond shade, sun bleached hair is usually pretty streaky, I don't know, looks fake to me.
I still think she's pretty, just don't like the angle about her being so natural and everybody else being fake. The exception of course is Lisa S, she is fake and she loves it, I still don't get that chick, how caould she think she is hot???

Lay offa poor Lisa S. Shes is hot, you'd hit that shit in a minute. Jess too... If you say you wouldnt then your just full of it.

Ooops!
3 demerits for too much eye makeup. You have 30 to go. Scrape off a little...

Otherwise: you're pretty smokin'....
And "yes," a gal changing her car's oil is sexy.
Until you become wealthy enough to BUY the Jiffy Lube down the street and have the hot little oil monkeys give you your own special "lube job" while you're sprawled on the hood of your car...arched back and legs apart.

Then you are verrrrry sexy.

True that Dave Johnson - - -

Wow a whole missed bastardly day yesturday.... i have a lot to catch up on.. so lets go..

JESSIE - F'in HOT - Love all the picts, love the personality.... LOVE IT ALL. KEEP IT UP - KEEP LOOKING HOT! the look is great for you....

some people have some serious issues in here that need to be addressed. The anger and rage for Lisa S. is something some of you need to look into. No names, they know who they are. Lisa, You know your hot, i know your hot. Keep it up...

Oh yea, ONE LAST THING.

Jess - "Heck yeah I do…sometimes they are too big though."

Jess? say a curse word for me... Please.
(say = type)

To Angelfood's comment (#87) impressive...I was never one for Hondas in the past but I'm starting to gain a new appreciation for them

Now the Cuda is a car!! My fav is the '71 Hemi Cuda convertible all matching numbers of course but my ultimate dream car would be a 1970 Chevelle SS454 with the LS6 package...mmmmmm chevelles ;)

Have a great weekend!!

i do think ur really pretty jessie but its unattractive to be so up yourself.

Iceman, nodakgirl is way, way out of your league.

(Peed!)

Iceman...sorry.
I'm only Real's.
And when he's not around?
Then I'm John's.
And when John and Real aren't lookin',
then I'm behind their backs with Lilyspryte.

And that's that.

I knew i was at the wrong party all along.

hey im back...no one will probably see this but i just wanted to say yes im a natural blonde. not that blonde though. what happened was that i was looking for a change so i dyed my hair dark brown january 05. it was cute but i missed being a blonde. and to get all that dye out i had to bleach it out. my hair is dirty blonde right now so i can grow it back out to its natural state without crazy roots. but my eyebrows and such are so dark cuz of the norwegian in me...who said im wearing too much eye makeup? the only picture im even wearing more than mascara only in is the one at the end from rocky horror picture show lingerie night 05. the point of that whole night is to look trashy. lol. haha iceman...if only u knew me in person...my favorite name to call people is "fuckface" lol it just feels weird to swear when im typing.

well jess, Yes i did read that. and im glad to know....

iceman (fuckface)

if anyone is still reading this...im halfway through this video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNJMwrqUlY4

she is pretty, kind of looks like Lindsay Lohan, but better.

the mariokart seals it. finally, a damn decent lady of the day.

Winner winner, chicken dinner. Big boobs, great attitude, works on cars. If I did her y'all would know about it.

Shes hot...I wonder why a chick workin' on a car gets me hot...?

Hahaha....I am crakin' up in my office at work...you crack me up Lisa :) As soon as the bastardly readers get a little worked up about someone else :) Dont worry hun your still number one in my heart...lol

Finally a BLOTD that is not raked over the coals! Kudos to you Jessie!

fucking and money don't go together unless you are a whore or need a fix - which neither have ever been a problem...obviously you have

John - The only problem is my POV and argument makes sense, yours is a stretch in fantasyland. Sorry to inform. BTW, agree on the pressley comment.

ey Jess, try using a filter wrench next time and you won't that problem. You gotta have all that stuff in your car case sh1t happens like that.

Cute, but seriously. Who thinks "hmm. I'm changing my oil. I should take a picture of this so I can post it and get complimented for knowing how to change my oil." I'm so over the I'm a girl who likes video games and cars let me prove it to you thing.

But she seems cool so good for you Jess.

oh just kidding...apparently img tags dont work on this

Jess is a cutie btw also. pretty girl.

I see how this works, if the girl is funny, it doesn't matter how unattractive she is, she still gets a thumbs up from the bastardly readers. But based on looks alone, she's a 3. Not hot, not tempting, or remotely sexy in any way. Just another plain Jane.

yeah...whatever....real

just keeping it real.....riiight

Hmmmmmm I'm undecided..as another car girl I have to ask Jessie what her favorite car is...that will be the deciding factor for me ;)

And Lisa S comment #29 you forgot the fair-skinned platinum blonde who is neither girl-next-door nor pornish like Pammy...lol

One of my friends fixed up a 'cuda.
He doesn't drive it around much because the gas mileage is the suck, but it's still an awesome vehicle.

nodakgirl -

Is this a fantasy of yours??? Can i be of any ASS-istance?? Sounds like you have put a lot of thought (aka.. wet dreams) into this little rant of yours..

hummm?>?

another sucess.. :)

and yes...cool/another saying *ok* for $3 million. :)

sure i smiled. *sorry* :)

boooorrrrinnnggggggggg

I change my oil, too! You can't beat it! And I fix flats........ I think you are my fav BLOTD so far. Oh, btw, Tekken Tag is SO MUCH BETTER than Mariokart! I know it's two different game stations, but that is beside the point. :)

"because if I wanted to be boning a guy; I’d go watch brokeback mountain or something. She appears to have some gender issues. I don’t understand guys who find a girl acting like a guy sexy, is it a closet fag phenomena? "

i think this is funny
i could make the exact oppisite argument
that guys that like girls that "act girly"
are not as secure in their heterosexuality so they need to constantly be reminded of, and reasured about their masculinity by women that are the antithisis of that
and that men who are secure with their masculintiy don't really care how feminine the woman acts
not to mention the fact that the gay man would have so much more to talk about with the "girly" woman

i can pat my head and rub my belly at the same time
WHAT'S UP!

It is funny to see multiple posts in a row praising the BLOTD in the same language and syntax. For example the previous 2 posts were probably written by the BLOTD or one of her friends and were not intelligent enough to make it even sound like 2 people writing.

Good look'n young lady. I LIKE!!

You're hot in the first picture! But it's all downhill from there... :s

Changin the oil is hot ;)

she does kind of look like jamie presley
best answer to the 3 million dollar question yet
the wisdom of socrates this one

I'd fuck yours for free.