The Bastadly MILF Institute: Angelina Jolie vs. Vanessa Bryant vs. Josie Maran



I was initially going to include Katie Holmes in this match up, but as long as Tom Cruise is around her, there is no hope for her acceptance into the Bastardly MILF Institute.

The Bastardly MILF Institute is nonprofit organization that admits new mothers only after carefully reviewing their MILFilicious...ness following their 1st six months of motherhood. We accept apps year around, so no worries ladies.

We only have one rule worth mentioning: You must be somewhat hot BEFORE jumping into the shallow well of pregnancy in order for your application to be seriously considered.

Now let's move on to our latest candidates. Final decision on these applications for admittance into the Institute will be made around Christmas, 2006 by Jackson, myself & others on the MILF Institute Board of Erections.

Comment on this Bastardly entry »

46 Scandalous Comments

Maran is nasty. Her swollen pregnant feet are hotter than what's going on with the rest of her.
Vanessa is a hottie.
Angie needs to clean up.
Vanessa is HOT.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:06pm
Reply to this Comment

Maran's feet look like Marlon Brando's (after he died). Fucking Yuck!

The thing about that though is all her weight it mostly water retention and once she pops that kid out...(Insert finger in mouth and pull on cheek) she will lose it all right away and be hot again.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:20pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa is beyond the hottest one!

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:21pm
Reply to this Comment

is there even any contest here....? angelina for sure! shes even on the cover of people for being the most beautiful...shes timeless

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:24pm
Reply to this Comment

If Angelina keeps a few pounds of pregnancy weight after all this and doesn't go back to to skeleton weight she may take it, otherwise Josie Moran's cow teat sucking slef will be the hottest (and dirtiest) MILF in the land. Except for my mom. She's fucking hot! And good in bed.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:29pm
Reply to this Comment

This oughtta piss some of you off but here is my opinion of Ang. I think she's breathtaking on the OUTSIDE! On the inside I think she's a very ugly ugly woman. Say what you will about adopting orphans and her humanitarian efforts but stealing another womans husband, wearing viles of blood around your neck, making out with your brother and acting crazy aren't a big turn on to me. I've talked about this to other people as well, and they agree.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:32pm
Reply to this Comment

60% of the time, Vanessa is the hottest everytime.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:33pm
Reply to this Comment

This is a "no-brainer": Vanessa Bryant. You gotta admire her brains, as well. Go girl!

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:37pm
Reply to this Comment

Well said Pottymouth

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:42pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa Bryant is/will be most pretty except for those fish lips. No matter how expensive that ring is, it still really gawdy.

Josie may never recover.
I never thought Angelina was that attractive.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:55pm
Reply to this Comment

Chad...I also found it so cliche that they made the Jolie-Pitts the "Worlds Most Beautiful Family". Fucking whatever!

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:08pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa is the hottest looking of the three AND she apparently doesn't mind sucking the love juice off Kobe's tool after he gets done bangin some slut which, in its own way, is also pretty hot.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:23pm
Reply to this Comment

judge ito
that is some funny shit
and maran will be the hottest milf

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:27pm
Reply to this Comment

They are all dirty fucking whores. But I'd do them preggers or not. Kobes od lady is hot but her coochie must be beat with the La Fakers slurping up on it.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:35pm
Reply to this Comment

buck:
and karl malone

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:47pm
Reply to this Comment

Who the fuck is Josie Maran?

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 2:24pm
Reply to this Comment

model
used to go out with david blaine
likes to show her tits
http://www.sexiest100.org/gallery/josiemaran,1/

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 2:29pm
Reply to this Comment

none of the above, Vanessa looks like she is one lip lining with brown eyeliner away from being the project skank ho, Angie is disgustingly thin, and that Josie chick just shouldn't be wearing anything that shows her ankles or stomach......... man oh man, even money and fame can't make some pregnant women beautiful. :)

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 3:05pm
Reply to this Comment

Fish lips or not Vanessa is hands down the hottest preggers chick and will consequently be the hottest MILF.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 3:06pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa's hot but that dress induces seizures.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 3:42pm
Reply to this Comment

who is josie marans baby father? anyone knows?

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 5:09pm
Reply to this Comment

Marlon Brando?

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 5:11pm
Reply to this Comment

Pregnant chicks ain't a turn on man.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 6:39pm
Reply to this Comment

vanessa is danm hot!!!! than angelina and josie who???? anyway im definitely not attractive by angelina she's weird and i don't like her lips her face is kind of artifical she got the same eyes as a snake!! and the way she dressed always in black she reminds me the mother of "adams family"

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 7:08pm
Reply to this Comment

Chances are they will remain fat. Take a look at Britney and Melissa.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 7:53pm
Reply to this Comment

Pottymouth-More like the "Worlds most Fucked Up Family" or "Worlds Best Lying Jackass family"

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 9:04pm
Reply to this Comment

well said pottymouth!

and btw, I like Vanessa

Sunday, April 30th, 2006 @ 3:39am
Reply to this Comment

ive always thought vanessa bryant was hot, but you are comparing two different fotos all together.
Vanessa is at a function where she has been made up to look absolutely gorgeous, and josie maran is just walking the streets in casual attire.
Let's not forget, Josie is the face of Maybelline and we've all seen how gorgeous she looks with makeup. Put them altogether without makeup and im sure they'll all look equally as beautiful.

Sunday, April 30th, 2006 @ 10:37am
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa just popped out a demon hellspawn of satan.

Monday, May 1st, 2006 @ 7:33pm
Reply to this Comment

uhh vanessa was already a milf before this........that's her second kid.

Friday, May 5th, 2006 @ 6:41am
Reply to this Comment

For those idiots who think Josie's ugly: she doesn't have any make on and most likely this picture was taken on the streets. Vanessa is completely made up, which is not to say that she isn't pretty, but that she's dolled up and shouldn't be compared to Josie. Angelina's picture was taken at a photoshoot for the People's 100 Most Beautiful issue. However, Josie looks like she just got up and went to get her morning coffee. Josie would be just as beautiful, if not more beautiful, than both of them if she bothered to put some makeup on, but it looks like she doesn't care (I wouldn't either if I looked like her).

Here's proof that Josie's probably more beautiful than 99.9% of women out there:
http://www.ryoni.com/news/123/ARTICLE/1390/2005-05-08.html

Monday, May 8th, 2006 @ 2:29am
Reply to this Comment

[...] Rather we’d like to officially congratulate Angelina’s acceptance into The Bastardly M.I.L.F. Institute. Yeah sure she already had super mega power adoption lottery winners Maddox and Zahara but we had to keep admission from Angelina until she gave birth to one of her own. Other members of this prestigious group include the likes of Brooke Burke, Vanessa Bryant, Elizabeth Hurley, and Denise Richards to name a few. [...]

Tuesday, May 30th, 2006 @ 1:28am
Reply to this Comment

angelinas the prettiest... vanessas second... josie is third

Tuesday, May 30th, 2006 @ 4:32pm
Reply to this Comment

agrees with lauren. Angelina is prettier than the rest :P

Friday, June 2nd, 2006 @ 3:11pm
Reply to this Comment

My vote goes out to : Angelina Jolie she is the hottest thing !

Friday, June 9th, 2006 @ 6:55am
Reply to this Comment

*dribble* all of them are hot

Tuesday, July 4th, 2006 @ 12:43pm
Reply to this Comment

Angelina of course! shes the best!

Monday, May 21st, 2007 @ 1:33am
Reply to this Comment

Why don't you find a picture of Angelina and Josie all dressed up like Vanessa and then we will decide who's the hottest of them three.

Tuesday, August 7th, 2007 @ 6:58pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa is gorgeous....angelina is not hot in any way... unless you like lollipops with fish lips and josie maran is pretty .... swollen feet and all

Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007 @ 10:10pm
Reply to this Comment

Vanessa, definitely.

Sunday, October 21st, 2007 @ 7:17pm
Reply to this Comment

Angelina is only on the cover of people cause of her popularity, wither good or bad. Vanessa hands down is the hottest!

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 12:33pm
Reply to this Comment

THEY ARE ALL DIRTY KNOCKED UP SLUTS WHO SHOULD BE SHOT IN THE BACK OF THE HEADS.

Friday, April 28th, 2006 @ 1:10pm
Reply to this Comment

[...] Rather we’d like to officially congratulate Angelina’s acceptance into The Bastardly M.I.L.F. Institute. Yeah sure she already had super mega power adoption lottery winners Maddox and Zahara but we had to keep admission from Angelina until she gave birth to one of her own. Other members of this prestigious group include the likes of Brooke Burke, Vanessa Bryant, Elizabeth Hurley, and Denise Richards to name a few. [...]

Tuesday, May 30th, 2006 @ 1:28am
Reply to this Comment

She is so beautiful! super sexy mum! shes so great and best actress i know!

She is awesome! Absolutely the hottest mum of all!

Monday, May 21st, 2007 @ 1:37am
Reply to this Comment

the others are pretty too

Monday, May 21st, 2007 @ 1:39am
Reply to this Comment

THEY ARE ALL WHORES,BITCHES,SLUTS AND CUNTS. FAT PIGS.

Tuesday, October 21st, 2008 @ 2:34pm
Reply to this Comment

Make a Scandalous Comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.

More information about formatting options

Please note: Do not use multiple nicknames & leave annoying, pointless comments that only attack other Bastardly Visitors. Also, blatant racial & sexual slurs for no particular reason will not be condoned. BREAK THE RULES: YOU WILL BE BANNED & appeals via email will not be considered. Before you comment, please be aware that no comments will be edited or deleted. Ever.

Lastly, if you have special scoop (i.e. scandalous photos, bastardly ex-girlfriends & boyfriends you want to expose, etc etc), please do contact us directly. You will remain anonymous!