Archive - Mar 29, 2005
Angry Cameron Diaz Shows Affection!
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 around evening with martini & women in hand
This is a rare-rare occurrence. Cameron Diaz is actually happy & showin' JT some puppy-love in public. We can't give Angry Cams all the credit here b/c we can't really see her face in the photo.
For the sake of all random blondes out there, let's hope it's Cams in the photo b/c I'd hate to be that blonde chick glued onto JT's balls. I'm thoroughly convinced that if JT cheats, Angry Cams will seriously hurt (possibly kill, by accident) JT's scandalous love interest.
Playmate In Bed: Hef Loves His Spicy Hiromi!
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 late in the whored-out afternoon while still at work
Go to Playboy's site & vote for your favorite Playmate in Bed Special Edition mag cover featuring none other than Hiromi Oshima! This might be a sign that Hiromi will not win 2005's Playmate of the Year honors considering she's getting exposure from other avenues. I know it's a little too soon to pull the trigger on this one, but it's just my educated guess.
One thing's for sure, though. Hef loves his Hiromi Oshima! The shriveled-up pimpdaddy doesn't want to lose his Asian flavored bunny b/c he knows the typical American male's tastes are slowly changing. Along with their steaks & hamburgers, they like to sample a little sushi & pad Thai every now & then, baby. With that in hand, I'm sure Hef's fully content with his weekly Hiromi Roll after he finishes up w/ Jillian, his twin-girlfriends & the rest of his bunny army.
Damn him to hell.
Related in a Bastardly way:
Random Hot Chick of the Day - Valeria Marini
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 in the middle of the damn afternoon
Valeria Marini. Not like I can read anthing on her website. But let's get to the point... she's hot, tastefully naked, and I'd like a glass of milk too. More please!!!!
JLo Butchers Peta Anti-Fur Billboard Ad
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 after a late four martini lunch
The graphic ad - initially accepted by Billboard to run in yesterday's edition, PETA says - features a grisly photo of a skinned animal over an open letter to Lopez, whose new Sweetface clothing line is replete with real fur. [Lloyd Grove me be a Peta Member. NY Daily News]
When it comes to upholding our constitutional free speech rights, JHo-bag doesn't really give a shit. In order to protect her furry fashion lines & success of her recently released & overrated Rebirth album, JHo used her clout in the industry to strike down an anti-fur ad that was to be published in the latest issue of Billboard magazine. I hate to admit this, but I would do the same. It's all about the dollah beeels, baby!
The good news: The ad didn't get printed.
The bad news?
The bad news is that she has angered the crazy people at Peta. Now, we all know what happens when the crazy people at Peta get angry, right? When the crazy people at Peta get angry they tend to do a lot of fucked up things in order to take revenge. You see, the revenge is now two-fold. Before they were only taking revenge for the helpless animals JHo skins with her manicured fingers. Now, they're also taking revenge for the vicious slap that JHo delivered on their faces (with her manicured hands).
* Jossip doesn't believe Lloyd Grove's take
Related in a Bastardly way:
Angry Cameron Diaz Trippin' On Her Big Head
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 while thinking about eating a Bastardly Mercado Certified lunch
Seriously. This woman is amazing at the bullshit she spits out. Last week I read a very disappointing article in USA Today about Angry Cam's new 'eco-friendly' travel show, Trippin', on MTV. It premiered last night, but no worries. I'm sure MTV will air it another 300 times before we hit the bloody weekend.
Well, I learned a few things:
1. Cams has a HUGE (I'm talking Dino-size here, people) head
2. She's a complete nature freak
3. She can be hypocritical
4. And lastly, Angry Cams reminds me of the Joker in the first Batman movie.
Related in a Bastardly way:
Bastardly Matchup: Vida Guerra vs. Maria Sharapova
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005 late in the morning while chugging coffee
So I'm pretty damn shocked that the lovely Vida Guerra was ranked no. 26 on FHM's 100 sexiest. I will now dedicate a series of Bastardly Matchups where Vida is obviously sexier than someone from the top 25. Her first opponent...no. 19, Maria Sharapova.
