Jessica Simpson Almost Has A Yummy Britney Spears Moment!
Posted on Thursday, March 27th, 2008 @ 3:00pm by Moelicious

These were snapped outside of Eva Longoria's Beso restaurant
If something like this did happen to Jessica Simpson, it might actually serve as a spark in her dying career. After analyzing all of Jessica's options at this point, we're recommending that she forgo all music and film-related efforts and concentrate more on properly cashing in her Bastardly Playboy Trump Card.
I'm pretty sure, that with very little coaxing and old-man handjobbing, Hef would cough up around $3-4mil to put Jessica on the cover---especially since he loves the blonde bimbo types.
| 48 Bastardly Comments »
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papa joe is totally jacking it right now
I bet she is still one of the best fucks in Hollywood. (and the easiest).
I'm sure her mom is proud.
i would lick every inch of her body
Oh Man...no snatch cam moment?
Holy shit how anyone can walk in those kind of shoes is beyond me..
Gah! So close!
Amazing! One well placed hand proves that no matter how dumb she is, she is still smarter than at least one other blonde Southern pop disaster.
Seriously, though, I really honestly have no idea what this girl ever sang. At least I know that Britney sang, umm, that song with the video where she was dressed up like a school girl and that other one where she was in red vinyl Emma Peel gear....
Her legs are her best feature! Yes, even better than her chest.
i would let her shit on my feet
She has quite exceptional legs.
I don't care if she is dumber than a box of rocks, she's still fine as hell. I'd love to go some rounds with that.
And thats the bottom line......
She's looking good here. Dating blue plushies from Six Flags aggres with her.
LMAO @ 1. Maybe she was taking her own upskirts with that Canon under the seat to post on her Myspace or dating sight!
"Shy single singer looking for Mr. Right that isn't my Daddy!"
Age: 27
Height: 5' 3 1/2" but 5' 9" in those heels
Weight: She hasn't sat on my face scale!
Hair Color: Blond on top, brunette underneath
Muff: Covered by hand!
I'm thinking she is the best fuck in Hollywood too, Dr. T.
Jessica never gets old. She always gets me hard. She is a no-talent whore, but the hottest one alive. You would think that even girls would find her hot if they had enough balls to be honest for a moment. But girls don't have any balls. They just have a hole. A black hole right in the center of their body. I bet Jessica's is hotter, wetter and tighter than most black holes, though. She always looks like she just got fucked, hard, and these pictures are no different.
Damn. I wanted to see that.
good girl!
gah, if only she had previously lost her left hand in an accident...then i'd be seeing some jessi-snatch...
I love her legs. good legs for a shorty
I kinda like the shoes, would fall off a lot if I wore those though.
if you imagine the space between her ring finger and pinky as a substitute for what lies beneath, you've got instant spank-bank material
Gorgeous legs
The words "yummy" and "Britney" are never allowed to be in the same sentence ever again.
Hand over the crotch, smart girl. Next time wear underwear...
I bet Nick lachey is relieved to be rid of this worthless ugly stupid ass boring lame bitch. who cant fucking sing either. I bet you all like her stupid ass song "All the girls steppin out for a public affair". Your all probably so fuckin lame that you bought that stupid CD and you probably listen to it too. At least Britney has hits and has performed at the VMA's. Unlike this ugly, stinky reject bitch! Whose ex-husband looks happier without her. And her face looks all stretched out. She thinks she is cute but she is stupid and ugly!
#24 take another prozac...she's hot, great legs, great natural boobs, pretty face, blow job lips, she doesn't need talent with that...maybe thats why your jealous
She does have some REALLY GREAT legs
oh man
i wish this would have happened
those legs are amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you guys are desperate if you think that tranny is hot. You must be extra fug and fat.
All I can think about today is Jessica. Those legs and that blonde hair. It must be paradise to slide into her sweet, sweet crease. It's like I'm in love. My stomach's all queasy. I'm all excited. I can't believe it's finally happened. I am in love for the first time. I love you, Jessica Simpson, you dirty fucking little whore. I want to light myself on fire in front of you so that I can prove my love. Let me inside of you, bitch, and I swear to God I will make all of your nightmares come true. Dreams are overrated.
I remember when they did the bastardly best legs matchup with Jessica simpson against Vanessa Minillo and everyone said Vanessa Minillo had the best legs and Jessica Simpsons legs were ugly. go's to show you how everyone contradicts themselves. Oh and Jessicas legs are still ugly.
youre just jealous jungle..
yeah, I would lick her legs
rico you've got low standards, bottoms of my feet are hotter than Jessica.
Jessica is tight. Those shoes are killer. Would love to bone her while she's wearing those shoes. Like cheesecake. And to the little ugly girls who are saying this pic is not hot: give it up. Go to another thread. You can't make a dent in this one. This pic of Jess is mint. End of story. Go bust on that ugly girl above. Calling Jess a "tranny." Lame. Nice try. Jess is 110% All-American Grade A Female. She should be on the Flag she's so righteous. Any girl who wears shoes like that is hotter than any girl who doesn't or won't. Junglegirl, I bet you're hairy and haven't had a dick inside of you since your Uncle Richard fingerbanged you under the table at Thanksgiving.
jungle..than I would love to kiss them..
;P
DAMN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nice legs
this chick is soooo hot. those legs need a licking... i'll just stop myself now before my sanity comes into question.
I love those legs, keep 'em comin'.
Love them shoes!!!
She looks more slimmer than usual, her legs anyway
i'd like to lick her legs too, but i see there's a queue here and i'll be damned if i'm going to lick up on another dudes saliva, so i kindly pass on this one
Nasty. Her thighs look to be dimpled with cellulite, too, adding to the foulness.
Nice body. Never a big fan of her face.
I agree with #16! These girls shouldn't show their goodies to the world........at lest not for free.
bet she has teeth in her pussy
just looking at how her fingers are placed on her gooey little t-what is heavenly.
aw, close call...i'd much rather see jessica's crotchagraph than britney's any day
Ugly bitch cant even come out with a decent movie nobody wants to see her ugly ass and ugly body too.
i think her legs are slim. except her hips.
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